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Archive for January, 2009

  • Are you as pissed about the $18 BILLION Wall Street CEOs got in bonuses while begging the Bush administration for welfare and getting it ( I won’t even go into the sudden GOP change of heart on bailouts, that’s another rant and frankly, a lesser one)? Are you fucking kidding me? And frankly, President Obama should do something about it. Congress is trying, having introduced a bill to cap CEO wages, but this is the great capitalist experiment gone awry. Gekko was right- greed is good. But you know something- so is humility. And Wall Street has zero of that.
  • Bruce ” Guitar God and Blue Collar Hero” Springsteen rightfully got slammed by his more liberal, Wal Mart hating fans ( ahem… right here) for striking an exclusivity deal. Today, while at a presser discussing the Superbowl Half Time Show ( I am to understand that the Super Bowl is some sort of football game with a huge concert at what I assume to be the half way point- God, I’m taking a piss, people, go Steelers), Mr. Thunder Road admitted that it was a mistake to sign that deal, considering Wal Mart exploitation of third world workers and their union bashing and everything.
  • Is it me, or does Idol suck in ways unforgivable this year?I know, wait till Hollywood week is over and see what talent we actually have. People bring up Jason Castro. I counter with Sanjaya.
  • Disney has cut four hundred jobs, the Hollywood trades are struggling, Murdoch’s empire is now a “sell”, OK! rag has editor ousted, and WSJ is looking at layoffs as well. The media is changing, filks, and it ain’t pretty for the old timers. As long as the Sun-Times keeps Ebert, I’m a-okay.
  • Anthony Bourdain says when he wakes up every morning, he’s angry at Rachael Ray. Me, too, buddy ( EVOO? Seriously, that’s piss ass annoying right there).
  • Elisabot is preggers again, Rosie not around to eat her alive this time. Sorry, it was too easy. I had to.
  • CBS great Katie Couric experiment came in second to Idol, which means it’s a smashing success.
  • Would you bump Nightline for Jimmy Kimmel when Conan takes over the Tonight Show? ABC say don’t be silly, but it’s a persistent bugger of a rumor that just won’t die. I am not a huge Jimmy fan ( the Matt Damon/Ben Affleck vids were hilarious, but he usually make s me cranky by the end of his monologue). I am, however, a fanatical Conan fan, and I would end up watching the great red head anyday. It clears me up to watch Craig Ferguson without guilt.
  • Earlier this week, legendary author John Updike died. I got wrapped up in reading Rabbit At Rest for the third time and never wrote anything. Something tells me Updike would have appreciated that. Writers ony want to be remembered for what they wrote and how it affected you as the reader. Everything else is dust bunnies.

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Barney’s got a MOM! And she will be played by Patricia Conroy, best known as the Matriarch on Six Feet Under.
Bonus casting for the 4-15 Episode labelled ” The Stinsons”- Barney has a ” wife and kid” on hire to fool mommy, and the ” wife” is going to be played by Brooke D’Orsay ( Kristy on TBBT- you know, the Whore of Omaha.)
Coolness.

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  • NBC rejects a PETA ad set to air during the Superbowl. Because vegans can’t possibly be football fans, you know.
  • The couple in Once had a fairy tale year last year. They fell in love, were in the best movie of 207, and won an Oscar for writing one of my favorite songs. Sadly, they have ended their two year relationship.
  • A woman has octuplets in California. And the eighth one was a surprise. I’m just thinking she’s nuts to attempt to try and breastfeed them all ( note- lactation supporters do not gang up on me- I breast fed my own kids, but seriously, all eight? No.)
  • Matt Damon states the obvious, Bill Kristol is an idiot, James Bond is a misogynist sociopath. Wait, say what on that last one?
  • Three arrested in the Bahamas for extortion after they try to scam $25 million from the Travoltas to prevent pictures of Jett’s lifeless body from making rounds. I am never going to the Bahamas.
  • Wikipedia contemplates rule changes after obits appear for Ted Kennedy and Robert Byrd.
  • Donny Osmond lets slip he’ll be on Dancing With The Stars. Expect a Foxtrot to ” One Bad Apple”, a waltz  to ” Puppy Love”, and a rhumba to ” Any Dream Will Do”.
  • Project Runway filming at Bryant Park despite having no airdate for season six.
  • Mike White ( writer, Chuck And Buck, actor, School Of Rock, famed apatow crowd reject) to appear on The Amazing Race with his gay activist dad. This will be interesting…
  • Natascha McElhone ( Californication, The Truman Show) lost her husband to a heart attack only a few months ago while pregnant with their third child. This weekend, she finally brought him out into public, and his name is Rex.
  • Government decides to postpone mandatory conversion to digital from analog till this summer, angering fans who have put off sweeps viewing till March, and PBS, who will lose $22 million dollars due to the delay.
  • Rick Warren’s magazine Purpose Driven Connection debuts with an interview with President Obama. I guess they both meant it when they talked about post-partisanism.
  • M.I.A. is thrilled with her Oscar nom, but the real question is- will she be able to perform? She’s due to give birth on February 8- Grammy night ( which will explain her absence), and the Oscars are only a mere two weeks later.
  • Geeks, rejoice! Red Dwarf is returning.
  • Daniel Radcliffe invites the Obama girls to visit Hogwarts with him.
  • ABC has approved pilots of V ( yes, based on the early 80s sci-fi mini series classic), Lost In The 80s ( The Wonder Years meets Fast times At Ridgemont High meets The Ice Storm– I so wanna see it now…)
  • Marvel is being sued for $750 million because they ain’t sharing the Spidey pie.

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You just knew Leonard wanted to have three seconds to himself every once in a while. We get a half hour of Sheldon a week. Imagine living with the guy…

Leonard, you see, needs to use a specific laser for an experiment, but it’s only available after hours, so he’s pulling the night shift at the lab. He told Sheldon he would be unavailable to drive him to work and that Sheldon would need to make other plans, but Sheldon ignored that advice and still expects to be chauffeured by Leonard. There’s also a bit with stimulating Star Wars sheets ( which leads to the question- Stimulating how, Sheldon?) and a snarky remark about the stagnant state of Leonard’s career.  Leonard proceeds to tell Sheldon to take the bus, but Sheldon refuses since buses have no seat belts and they won’t allow him to lash himself to the seats with bungee cords. When that proves fruitless, Sheldon knocks on Penny’s door, and invokes the favor clause built into friendships. Penny agrees to drive Sheldon, who nitpicks about her check engine light ( it’s been on for a month), Penny’s drinking coffee while driving, her route up Euclid Avenue, her not slowing down for speed bumps, and decides to pepper her with arcane trivia and science games.  Penny shows remarkable restraint until Sheldon starts up about the engine again, and she pulls over and kicks him out of the car.

After work, Sheldon runs into Leonard in the cafeteria, where he expects a ride home. Howard agrees with Sheldon’s opinion that Leonard said that he wasn’t able to get a ride to work. Leonard said nothing about the ride home. Howard regrets this decision when Sheldon is denied and expects a ride home with Howard, which involves Howard’s scooter and Euclid avenue’s speed bumps. Convinced Howard is trying to kill him, Sheldon is again abandoned and calls Raj. When that appears to no longer be an option, Sheldon returns to Penny for a ride to Pottery Barn to return the star Wars sheets. Penny slams the door.

The gang decides to proceed with an intervention, and set up an appointment for Sheldon at the DMV. He proves to be a giant ass there as well, and the DMV lady stamps a learner’s permit just to get rid of him. At home, Howard sets up an elaborate simulator ( Sheldon’s desire to drive the batmobile is denied). It proves to be a disaster, and later, while still trying to learn how to drive, Sheldon ends up on the second floor of the Glendale Galleria and crashes into the pet store. Sheldon decides he is ” transcending the situation” and quitting, as he is a Homo novus, and simply too evolved for the plebian task.  He then moves into his office at the university. Leonard conveniently decides to forget to tell him the experimient is over, just for some peace and quiet. After all, when Sheldon comes back, Leonard is the permanent chauffeur again.

A moderately successful outing, as it’s all A story and a lot of Sheldon. The drving simulator stuff is pretty hilarious.  There are great lines for Jim Parsons, but the rest of the cast aren’t given enough to do.

Grade- B-

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Qucik TV Note:

Ausiello over at EW.com is reporting that ABC is benching new episodes of Ugly Betty in favor of Samantha Who? and the midseason comedy In The Motherhood. Everyone prepare for one of the funiest and most diverse casts to be bounced from the schedule.

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  • Kate Winslet looked amazing.
  • Meryl Streep is apparently not used to winning despite the fact she is the greatest living actress, for which I apologize calling her, since she seems clearly embarrassed when people call her that, even though she is. Just not in Doubt.
  • Sean Penn needs to shut up. Che? Seriously, dude? ( I am looking forward to it, but I’ll follow Soderbergh to the grave he dug for me and praise him as he tosses handfuls of dirt until I’m buried and have suffocated, so I might not be the best judge, as I also sat through Solaris and Bubble).
  • Heath Ledger won-again. The term shoo in at the Oscars no longer applies, it’s destiny in possibly the saddest possible way.
  • Jane Krakowski should be forbidden to give acceptance speeches anymore on the behalf of 30 Rock . That was agonizing.
  • James Earl Jones is God.
  • Anthony  Hopkins looked shockingly frail, and now I’m fretting about him.
  • Surprise of the night, TV side- Well, Hugh Laurie beating out Jon Hamm and then being funny.
  • Surprise of the night, Movie side- Meryl. Meryl. Oy, Meryl.
  • Slumdogcontinues on it’s way to coronation.
  • Let’s face it based on the cheers from the audience- any other year, Ben Button would win. Or come in a close second to Milk. But this year, the little British and Indian film has stolen the thunder.
  • I wanna be Tina Fey. I know I say that ever award show.

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  1. EW’s Ausiello confirmed with David Shore and Katie Jacobs that indeed House and Cuddy will get it on later this season. Seriously? How much of Hugh Laurie do I get to view?
  2. Question put to Idol fans- should anyone who has had a major label deal at one point be banned from competeing? Then at least the controversy will stop, right? I think the key is major label- indie artists have a much tougher go at it, but after Carly Smithson last year and that Joanna girl this year, the naysayers are sapping all joy out of the show. BTW- I didn’t think Joanna was all that and a popsicle.
  3. The Dark Knight will reappear at IMAX screen across the universe. I’m gonna go see it again. You?
  4. That Nimoy napkin on the Saturnalia episode of TBBT? Well, they got one actually signed by Spock himself and now they’ve put it on the auction block. Proceeds go to The Beit T’Shuvah “Steps to Recovery” Gala , Nimoy’s charity of choice. Suh-WEET!
  5. Apparently, Elisabeth Moss ( Peggy Olsen on Mad Men and one time Zoe Bartlett in an alternate universe where Josiah Bartlett once ruled Ameirca) is engaged to SNL funny man Fred Armisen. Rumor is it was a whirlwind romance, but I wish them both luck, as she’s amazing and he makes me laugh consistently.
  6. Some people are worried about the increasing Googlization of the arts- as Google wins the right to upload books to the net. Books. You know, those things with pages and covers that sit on shelves but no oneever opens anymore while waiting for th inevitable disappointment of a movie with companion video game?
  7. Anderson Cooper- drunk. ( I’ll post the link ths evening).
  8. Oh, and that Oscar show thing got rolling this week.
  9. The Screen Actor’s Guild Awards are on this weekend.

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Ah, yes, so it arrived with much fanfare, and some choices have left me puzzled, other delightfully surprised. More on that later. But first, the list.

BEST PICTURE
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Frost/Nixon
Milk
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

BEST DIRECTOR
Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
David Fincher, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Ron Howard, Frost/Nixon
Stephen Daldry, The Reader
Gus Van Sant, Milk

BEST ACTOR
Richard Jenkins, The Visitor
Frank Langella, Frost/Nixon
Sean Penn, Milk
Brad Pitt, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler

BEST ACTRESS
Anne Hathaway, Rachel Getting Married
Angelina Jolie, Changeling
Melissa Leo, Frozen River
Meryl Streep, Doubt
Kate Winslet, The Reader

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Josh Brolin, Milk
Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
Robert Downey Jr., Tropic Thunder
Philip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt
Michael Shannon, Revolutionary Road

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Amy Adams, Doubt
Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Viola Davis, Doubt
Taraji P. Henson, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Marisa Tomei, The Wrestler

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
Frozen River , Courtney Hunt
Happy-Go-Lucky, Mike Leigh
In Bruges, Martin McDonagh
Milk, Dustin Lance Black
WALL-E, Andrew Stanton, Jim Reardon, Pete Docter

BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Eric Roth
Doubt, John Patrick Shanley
Frost/Nixon, Peter Morgan
The Reader, David Hare
Slumdog Millionaire, Simon Beaufoy

BEST ANIMATED FEATURE
Bolt
Kung Fu Panda
WALL-E

BEST ART DIRECTION
Changeling
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
The Duchess
Revolutionary Road

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
Changeling
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
The Reader
Slumdog Millionaire

BEST COSTUME DESIGN
Australia
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Duchess
Milk
Revolutionary Road

BEST DOCUMENTARY FEATURE
The Betrayal (Nerakhoon)
Encounters at the End of the World
The Garden
Man on Wire
Trouble the Water

BEST DOCUMENTARY SHORT
The Conscience of Nhem En
The Final Inch
Smile Pinki
The Witness — From the Balcony of Room 306

BEST EDITING
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
Frost/Nixon
Milk
Slumdog Millionaire

BEST FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM
The Baader Meinhof Complex (Germany)
The Class (France)
Departures (Japan)
Revanche (Austria)
Waltz with Bashir (Israel)

BEST LIVE ACTION SHORT
Auf der Strecke (On the Line)
Manon on the Asphalt
New Boy
The Pig
Spielzeugland (Toyland)

BEST MAKEUP
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
Hellboy II: The Golden Army

BEST ORIGINAL SCORE
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Alexandre Desplat
Defiance, James Newton Howard
Milk, Danny Elfman
Slumdog Millionaire, A.R. Rahman
WALL-E, Thomas Newman

BEST ORIGINAL SONG
”Down to Earth,” (WALL-E)
”Jai Ho,” (Slumdog Millionaire)
”O Saya,” (Slumdog Millionaire)

BEST SOUND EDITING
The Dark Knight
Iron Man
Slumdog Millionaire
WALL-E
Wanted

BEST SOUND MIXING
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
Slumdog Millionaire
WALL-E
Wanted

BEST VISUAL EFFECTS
The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
The Dark Knight
Iron Man

Notes on the nominees:

1) Pleasant surprises: Richard Jenkins and Melissa Leo’s nominations for two very small indie flicks that were much revered ( Frozen River was a Sundance 2008 fave and award winner). They were also early 2008 releases and i was afraid they’d both be lost to later, showier parts. Leo you may remember from Homicide: Life On the Street. Jenkins is one of those ” That guy” actors ( I remember him as the psychiatrist Ben Stiller talks to at the beginning of There’s Something About Mary).

2) Stunned- STUNNED- but overjoyed by Michael Shannon’s nomination for Revolutionary Road. He had little buzz due to the Heath Ledger noise. He also has no shot, nor do Robert Downey Jr., Phillip Seymour Hoffman, or Josh Brolin, although Brolin has an outside shot ( he has actually won some critics awards). But if he was noticed by the Academy, Shannon’s odds might be better than we realize.

3) Expect Wall-E to win Animated. The other two flicks don’t stand a chance.

4) Dance With Bashir will win the Foreign Language award, even though Italy’s Gommorra was by far the best foreign film of the year ( it wasn’t nominated. What up?)

5) Peter Gabriel will be an Oscar winner for best song.

6) Best Doc Feature is a toss up between the stunning and engrossing Man On Wire, which has dominated pre Oscar shows. But do not count out the moving Trouble The Water. It’s about Katrina and the aftermath.

7) Robert Downey Jr’s nomination is only his second. Seriously.

8) Kate Winslet was nominated for the wrong movie. Therefore she will lose to Anne Hathaway unless they give it to Meryl, who gave what is possibly my least favorite performance of these nominees, but it’s MERYL.

9) Expect Mickey Rourke, Penelope Cruz to win for their categories. Cruz is a supporting actress nominee in a Woody Allen film. It worked for Mira Sorvino and Dianne Weist ( twice).

10) Benjamin Button leads with thirteen, Slumdog has ten, Frost/Nixon five, Milk eight, The Reader five, Doubt five, The Dark Knight  eight ( mostly in lesser tech categories), and Wall-E five.

11) Movie that gets to call itself an Oscar nominee despite being crap- Hellboy II.

12) Viola Davis is onscreen in Doubt for about five minutes.

13) Apparently the Academy preferred the turgid, lumbering The Reader to the astonishingly acted, but cutting and depressing Revolutionary Road, which is clearly the superior film. Kate was resplendent in the latter, and as much as I love her, her performance in the former left me cold. RR picked up a few nods in lesser categories.

14) All the best directors have their pictures nominated as well. Remember, the Academy has a tendency to have a best picture nominee that apparently directed itself in the mix.

15) If Slumdog does indeed prevail, it will have done so without a single acting nomination. I can’t recall the last time that happened off the top of my head.

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Is anyone else giddy over Jon Hamm’s upcoming three episode arc on 30 Rock? Jon Hamm. Tina Fey. Come on, people, this is gold!

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RAZZIES!

As is tradition, the Razzie awards have announced their nominees for the worst movies of 2008 a day before the Academy makes their picks for the best known. Mike Myers atrocious The Love Guru picked up the most nods.

The list:

WORST PICTURE

DISASTER MOVIE (Lionsgate) and MEET THE SPARTANS (20th Century-Fox) {Two Movies Jointly Nominated for Sharing One Berry Badly Beaten Dead Horse of a Concept!}

THE HAPPENING (20th Century-Fox)

THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE (Regent Releasing/Purple Pictures)

IN THE NAME OF THE KING: A DUNGEON SIEGE TALE (Boll KG/Brightlight Pictures)

THE LOVE GURU (Paramount)

WORST ACTOR

Larry the Cable Guy / WITLESS PROTECTION

Eddie Murphy / MEET DAVE

Mike Myers / THE LOVE GURU

Al Pacino / 88 MINUTES and RIGHTEOUS KILL 

Mark Wahlberg / THE HAPPENING and MAX PAYNE

WORST ACTRESS

Jessica Alba / THE EYE and THE LOVE GURU

The Cast of THE WOMEN (Annette Bening, Eva Mendes, Debra Messing, Jada Pinkett-Smith and Meg Ryan)

Cameron Diaz / WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS

Paris Hilton / THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE

Kate Hudson / FOOLS’ GOLD and MY BEST FRIEND’S GIRL

WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

Carmen Electra / DISASTER MOVIE and MEET THE SPARTANS

Paris Hilton / REPO: THE GENETIC OPERA

Kim Kardashian / DISASTER MOVIE

Jenny McCarthy / WITLESS PROTECTION

Leelee Sobieski / 88 MINUTES and IN THE NAME OF THE KING

WORST SUPPORTING ACTOR

Uwe Boll (as Himself) Uwe Boll’s POSTAL

Pierce Brosnan / MAMMA MIA!

Ben Kingsley / THE LOVE GURU, WAR, INC. and THE WACKNESS 

Burt Reynolds / DEAL and IN THE NAME OF THE KING               

Verne Troyer / THE LOVE GURU and Uwe Boll’s POSTAL

WORST SCREEN COUPLE

Uwe Boll & ANY Actor, Camera or Screenplay

Cameron Diaz & Ashton Kutcher / WHAT HAPPENS IN VEGAS

Paris Hilton & EITHER Christine Lakin OR Joel David Moore / HOTTIE & THE NOTTIE 

Larry the Cable Guy & Jenny McCarthy / WITLESS PROTECTION 

Eddie Murphy IN Eddie Murphy / MEET DAVE

WORST PREQUEL, REMAKE, RIP-OFF or SEQUEL (Combined Category for 2008)

THE DAY THE EARTH BLOWED UP REAL GOOD

DISASTER MOVIE and MEET THE SPARTANS

INDIANA JONES AND THE KINGDOM OF THE CRYSTAL SKULL

SPEED RACER

STAR WARS: THE CLONE WARS

WORST DIRECTOR 

Uwe Boll / 1968: TUNNEL RATS, IN THE NAME OF THE KING and POSTAL   

Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer / DISASTER MOVIE and MEET THE SPARTANS 

Tom Putnam / THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE 

Marco Schnabel / THE LOVE GURU 

M. Night Shyamalan / THE HAPPENING

WORST SCREENPLAY

DISASTER MOVIE and MEET THE SPARTANS, both Written by Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer

THE HAPPENING, Written by M. Night Shyamalan

THE HOTTIE AND THE NOTTIE, Written by Heidi Ferrer

IN THE NAME OF THE KING: A DUNGEON SIEGE TALE, Screenplay by Doug Taylor

THE LOVE GURU, Written by Mike Myers & Graham Gordy

WORST CAREER ACHIEVEMENT (Special Category!)

Uwe Boll (Germany’s Answer to Ed Wood)

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After last weeks disturbing Ted story about how he kept nailing Aunt Robin, I half expected an episode that opened on the kids receiving electroshock therapy to burn the images away. Or an episode in which Ted pesters Barney into admitting his actual feelings for Robin ( Lily would have told Marshall a while back, as this season we have established Lily cannot keep a secret to save her life). But instead we get a standard HIMYM gem in which Ted and Barney mack on some barely legals, Marshall and Lily do cute and cheesy romantic stuff, and Robin wears very little clothing at some point and is the cynic in the whole shebang.

Story A: Ted and Barney meet some hot young thangs and try to set up a date. Seeing their band played was nixed because Barney didn’t want to be the bleached blonde skank waving her boobs at a Van Halen concert ( although Ted does point out those girls usually get to have sex with Van Halen- I sure hope he was referring to Van Halen circa 1984…). Exchanging phone numbers was also eschewed by the Barnacle ( if they have your number, they can call and cancel and you are screwed in a very unpleasant way).  But they agree to meet the next night at McLarens. But it starts to snow. Heavily. So much so that they are the only two in McLarens the next night when Carl tells them to take off, he’s closing early to go and set up beds for the homeless. Instead, he agrees to allow Barney and Ted man the bar till their dates show up. This allows for a cool Cocktail inspired sequence that ends with the boys breaking liquor bottles and glasses all over the place. It also fulfills a dream they both have in which they open a bar called Puzzles ( why Puzzles? That’s the puzzle). They girls finally arrive, and ask to bring the whole band with them. The guys agree, but our band is actually the Arizona Tech Fighting Hens Marching Band. Oopsies, boys. Needless to say, fifty drunken college students are not neat, and when Carl calls to inform them he’s on his way back, they move the party upstairs to the apartment, where B&T agree not to open a bar. Then they decide to start a band. Named Puzzles.

Story B: Marshall and Lily started this cute airport pickup thing a while back in which the picker upper wears a chauffeurs hat and carries one of those signs with the arrival’s name on it, and the one who is arriving brings a six pack of local microbrew from where ever they had been. Since it’s the HIMYM universe, they are able to take this on the plane. But they have decided to put this aside. But it’s Marshall and Lily, so that didn’t last long. Marshall feels guilty for letting Lily’s lunch time phone call go to voice mail, and Lily admits to herself Marshall would be there waiting for his beer ( leading to them both believing if they don’t follow through on their ritual, the other would leave them for someone hotter, and in Marshall’s case, more height appropriate). Marshall convinces a barely dressed Robin ( the radiator was broken, apparently, but Cobie’s baby bump is getting noticeable) to drive him to the airport. On the way there, Marshall and  Robin get into a fight about love and rituals- Robin thinks they’re stupid, leading to Marshall to call her a robot. Robin, hurt, pulls over, and while they fight, the car gets buried in a ton of snow by a plow. Marshall admits that he loves these little rituals he and lily have, and apologizes for his snide remark to Robin, and the two escape the car and somehow make it to the airport. Where they discover Lily’s flight was delayed in Seattle.

Story C ( Which feeds into story B): Lily commandeers Rajit ( yay! Rajit!) and goes to get a six pack of microbrew from Seattle in NYC because of the sudden guilt that Marshall wouldn’t get his beer ( and again, that image of the blonde Amazon in he head). It turns out all they had was a keg. Lily gets it. She waits for Marshall. Who shows up with  the Arizona Tech Fighting Hens Marching band Now they have to get a marching band each time one of them gets home from a flight.

Overall, a cute, charming episode that still felt like a bit of a letdown after last weeks’ disturbing but gut wrenching Barney episode. Neil Patrick Harris needs an Emmy STAT.

Grade: B+

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Congratulations

To President Barack Obama. You are now the 44th President of the United states of America. With great power comes great responsibility. Never forget that.

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Sheldon, Sheldon, Sheldon. Oh, Sheldon. You wonderful, arrogant, narcissistic jackass. You cannot boil people and relationships down to algorithms. No matter how hard you try. You may be a genius, but you forget- with imperfect creatures like humans, there are simply too many variables.

Last week’s episode was a bit of a let down, but this week, with Jim Parson’s socially clueless Sheldon centre stage, the show hit a good one for the most part. We start with one of the greatest cold opens ever. Sheldon and Raj are debating the best kind of pudding- Raj is in favor of Tapioca, Sheldon is 100% correct in say chocolate ( chocolate fudge pudding, to be precise). Sheldon then attempts to regale his table with a fact about the plant tapioca comes from, but Leonard, Raj , and Howard refuse to allow him to finish his thought, allowing Jim Parson’s physical comedic gifts shine through as Sheldon desperately tries to interject his arcane knowledge and gets shot down. He spasms, contorts, and as desperation sets in, literally looks as though he’s about to fall apart, until Leonard deems it cruel to continue. Sheldon explodes, then drinks water in the most ridiculously desperate way imaginable. ” You promised you’d stop doing that,” he tells Leonard bitterly afterwards.
Sheldon has a bit of a conundrum. See, he needs a certain lab at the university. This lab is apparently under the control of one Barry Kripke ( see last weeks episode- the dude with the speech impediment that only Raj mentioned. Leonard informs our beloved egomaniac that Kripke only allows his friends to use the equipment Sheldon needs, which causes Sheldon to decide to-*GASP*- make Kripke his new friend. Of course, he does this in the most Sheldon way imaginable. He creates a questionnaire ( which seems to resemble an S.A.T. judging from everyones reaction to it). When that proves to be enormously frustrating for him ( he’s upset his friends don’t take the questionnaire seriously, although to their credit, they answered it), he takes to the next logical step- the children’s book section of the local bookstore, which leads to Sheldon meeting a little girl and unaware of social niceties, he comes off as looking beyond creepy. Leonard pulls him away before the inevitable happens.
Reading Stu the Cockatoo Is New At the Zooallows Sheldon to create a greaseboard with the title algorithm on it. He calls Kripke and follows it till he reaches a loop. Howard remedies this by giving him an escape, which cause Sheldon to remark, ” I’m surprised you saw that.”  Howard remarks on how he finds it amazing Sheldon has any friends at all.

Sheldon’s out was to go indoor rock climbing with Kripke. This ends rather amusingly with Sheldon, who’s fear of heights is ” non-existent” but his fear of falling very real, passing out about halfway. I was actually shocked Sheldon even attempted it, as Sheldon is not known for taking any risks at all. But he manages to get Kripke to come over for food ( leading to him deciding that Penny’s name is not hot enough and renaming her. Howard’s little aside about not looking so bad considering actually end up making the last episode now funnier, which is a major comedic achievement). The rest of the gang, not pleased with this new friendship with someone who essentially amounts to a geek who bullies than simply because he’s only a tad less geeky than they are,are then infomed that Sheldon can only afford in his life four friends. Leonard is safe as he is the roomate, Penny because of the fact that she adds something different, and Howard- well, I’m not even sure why, other than Sheldon was miffed Raj answered the lycine question wrong on the questionnaire, so Raj was eliminated from Sheldon’s friend list. But when Sheldon tries to get Kripke to allow him access to the equipment he needs, Kripke informs him that there is a schedule he has no control over. Sheldon, non plussed about the futility of his efforts,  simply decides Kripke is now out and gives Raj the dumplings.

Strong work from Jim Parsons throughout the series means that Sheldon episodes are more likely as the series continues. That’s an issue with breakout characters on sitcoms, particularly ones as well played as Sheldon. But everyone had a few jabs and one liners, and Leonard finally got a chance to tell Penny how he and Sheldon became friends ( basically, he was allowed to be Sheldon’s roommate as long he didn’t whistle). But it was truly a Sheldon moment, and it shined. I laughed, I laughed, I laughed some more. And thank God for quick closers, as we see the guys staring up at a passed out Sheldon, dangling from a harness as he again failed to make it up the rock climbing wall. It was less than ninety seconds. Brilliant.

Grade- B+

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Is it wrong I just downloaded a bunch of Monty Python sketches from ITunes?

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  1. The Big Bang Theory– a bit of a let down considering the glorioski ending of the Christmas/Saturnalia episode, but still, nothing better than Sheldon running down the hallway shreiking ” Don’t hurt us! Don’t hurt us! DON’T HURT US!”. BTW, the guy who plays Kripke- yes, I know people who are pissed about the ” speech impediment”, but whatever, I laughed, I’m a huge bitch and some Brits may even call me that other one I really hate- but anyhoo, I came across his Livejournal blog in my daily email reading, and he’s a crack up there, too.
  2. How I Met your Mother– will somebody hand Neil Patrick Harris the motherfucking EMMY ALREADY! God damn it, people, he was amazing this week.
  3. Criminal Minds– well, it was okay. C level for me. Wasn’t as taken in as I was on other episodes. WTF was up with MGG’s hair?
  4. 30 Rock– I wanna be Tina Fey. Still. Really, really badly. I am nowhere near that funny. Or that pretty. Damn it. I’m gonna eat another three giant M&M Chocolate chunk cookies…
  5. No House means no House and Cuddy sex watch this week. And apparently Chase and Cameron are still alive, although you could never tell from their screen time.
  6. Kevin James has the number one movie in America this week and it took in over $34 MILLION. WTF, America?
  7. Joaquin Phoenix used to be on my husbands list. Now I’m afraid to run into him in a dark alley. Come back, sexy man who played the Man In Black, and get rid of that wooly mammoth you’ve become.
  8. Obama rules.
  9. Obama will be president on Tuesday, and I’m taping MSNBC while at work. Oh, yeah, I upgraded to digital cable so I could have MSNBC, KTLA, WGN, and HBO Canada.
  10. Oscar Noms will be out on Thursday.

Anyone want to add anything. Comments are open. And yes, I avoided the news about the DC-KC breakup because- well, whatever.

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Momento:

I would like to thank all you wacky Alphainventions people. the last time you were all here thanks to the awesomeness of that site, you gave me my highest daily viewing numbers. Please. Stay, wander around. Just don’t touch the records or the dvds, please.

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This time from the other great CBS sitcom, How I Met Your Mother and Proceeded to tell My Teenage Children of How I Slept With their Aunt Robin all the Time ( I was  little disturbed with Ted’s story this week…). Ted’s ex and future girlfriend has been cast and she’s being played by Laura Prepon ( That 70’s Show). She’s there for at least five episodes and her character is the opposite of sweet but flawed Stella. And no, we don’t know if she’s the mother. God, people, it’s gonna be picked up for a fifth season… celebrate!

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If your like me and  pissed off at the quality of The Office this season ( not as funny as it could be…) but miss the glorious Michael-Holly romance, well, yee-haw, Amy Ryan is desired back by our favorite NBC comedy not starring Tina Fey. They are currently hammering out a deal for her to return for the season finale and are looking for some permanance. While not yet final, this would make me the happiest girl in the world.

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More Joyous News!

Tina Fey and company will be back as 30 Rock has been renewed. Thank you, president of the Tina Fey Fan Club Ben Silverman!

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This Makes Me Laugh

Again provingthat censor happy freaks are crazier than a loon- they all have the FCC looking at the Globes bird flipping by Darren Aronofsky during Mickey Rourke speech. But where I live in Canada, I heard one ” fuck” and one ” bullshit” and they aren’t investigating that? Plus Mickey Rourke said balls something like twenty seven times, but I think that is allowed on television in that context. Oy.

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